72 Is A Number. What I Did with It Is A Life Well Lived.
There is nothing special about being 72 years old. Hell, my aunt just turned 101. I remember thinking 21 was a big deal. Then, there was 30 because I thought I wouldn’t be able to trust myself anymore (Boomers will get this). 40 was going to be about mid-life crisis and 50 was like: wow, I’m old. Then, came 60 and I just said “f*ck it, I can’t stop it!” and the years rolled past 70 into 72. What’s next? Oh yeah, I look forward to 75.
Once you stop messing around stressing about numbers and think more about what those numbers represent, then you can decide if they meant anything or whether you were wasting your time. I’ll tell you, I may have wasted a few years there but overall, I ate those years up like they were the last years I would live. I often speak about life being like a buffet. Eat it all up until you feel full and then take a breath and get back on the line for some more.
The past week, I’ve been flashing back to the experiences in my life and that I have been busy on that buffet line. Growing up in the projects of the South Bronx. My mother, Ana Estrella Ruiz, an immigrant from the Dominican Republic. My Father, Antonio Ruiz, from Puerto Rico. Both proud people who taught me better than I often acted. My family, Peter (deceased), Margaret, Virginia, Joseph, Donnie, Susie, Norma, and the countless children that passed through our home because of my mother’s dedication to foster children. That taught me a lot about humanity and caring for people and the world around me. From the Civil Rights era to anti-Vietnam Marches to anti-Apartheid marches to Community control of Eduction and so many other causes, they all came from my parents and the countless people who served as mentors, teachers, counselors.
Yes, as I said in one of my recent Facebook posts, I have had many defeats in life, mostly caused by me. But, those defeats were wisdom teachers. I learned so much, even when I often would forget that wisdom and would go on and f*ck up again. Well, there’s another bit of wisdom learned. Funny how life can be.
I have lived in a lot of places and done a lot of interesting things. Seminarian. Protestor. Junkie. Alcoholic. Community Organizer. Wall Street. Married three women. Lived with two others (at different times). Radio host and producer. Bartender. Motorcycle courier. Television reporter. Shuttle driver. Mentor. Television producer and Executive Producer. Now, a college student. Trust me, there’s way more, some of which I can’t say and some I won’t.
The lesson? You can either grind through life and end up at 72 wishing you had done a few interesting things and regretted you didn’t or you can live every opportunity you get and some you make to the fullest. I chose the latter and have not regretted (well, maybe sometimes) most of it. That’s because it is who I am today and that I don’t regret.
P.S. Thank you, family: Sumire, my sons Antonio and Daichi, Linda, Margaret, Virginia, Joseph, Donnie, and all the rest of the kin.
